Cancelled!

Cancelled Trip2,
originally uploaded by intheloo.

Well.. we're supposed to go to the Manila Ocean Park today, even after all the other folks have cancelled last Sunday.. but I haven't heard anything from my supposed to be companion since we talked yesterday so I guess we're not goin..

I am a bit disappointed since I really wanted to see this.. but he said that we should wait until the place is complete so we would really get our money's worth..

Well.. he has a point there.. but I sure wish the next trip wouldn't be like this..

Harry's Last Stand

Right now, I'm taking a short break from reading the final book from the Harry Potter series : Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows. I'm actually down to Chapter 11 and I'm really finding the whole story full of adrenaline rush with all the close calls and attacks the characters have to go through during the first few chapters. Whew! Don't worry, I'm not going to spill the beans or anything. It would be best if you would be reading it for yourself, right? I must admit that I'm torn between trying to finish everything today before I go back to work tomorrow early morning, or just relishing each line (just like what Rednax must be doing!) since this would be the last time that I would ever read anything new about the most popular wizard in the world. I remember the first time I came across the story of Harry Potter and his magical world. I was in college then and I was already hearing about the craze about it. I first saw the movie.. I was awed and it made me want to buyt the first 3 books then. But not until I read the Goblet of Fire, which I really want to thank my former sweetheart, who graciously and unselfishly lent me the book to read, even though he was not done with it yet and his brother might kill him for lending it to someone. It became my favorite book in the series and I was hooked.

FACt: I have never bought a single Harry Potter book in my life. Yeah, I actually read all of them, and we even have all but the Goblet book, (most of them were acquired by my sister, and their British copies to boot! and Order of the Phoenix was bought by my sister). But I will buy my own copy, and am prepared to shell out 1305 bucks for a hardcopy since this would be the last book..

Oh well, back to reading.. "Accio, book!" hehe.

When it rains, it pours (the bad kind)

I'm grieving right now.. grieving alone infront of my station, with a throbbing headache due to the 3 glasses (cocktail glasses!) of margarita I drank at Gerry's for Jayson's post breakfast birthday treat. I should be working on QA or something, but since our weekly deliverables were cut down in half (breathe!) I have a lot of freetime after shift.. (right not I have time to compose this blog.)

Ouch! I could feel the pain in my head and I really just want to go home and sleep. I'm logged out of ym right now. Like I said, I'm grieving over something that never should have been, never been there in the first place. Well, thanks to that stupid email, which was carelessly forwarded..coupled with fits of jealousy, and there goes everything that made me happy for the past so and so months (or has it been years already?) would you believe that I'm getting teary eyed right now as I am typing this? Of course! All I could do is to just reminisce and think of things that could not be taken back anymore, and to think, most of my support group (and I'm sorry, but it's not the Troopers) are in the gy shift.. I just get to be with them for a short period of time since I'm in this shift. I really wish I'm back on the gy shift. Things are alot simpler when I'm working gy then.

When it rains, it pours.. in this case, I'm being rained down with unfavorable moments.. aside from the break in my personal life, work seems to demotivating me altogether too. I won't go into specific details, and I'm really too tired to understand anymore. All the redtape and possible backbiting..the unreasonable workload.. Arrgghh!

I wish that this would pass.. I wish that this would all end. That I would just be over you.. not to wait for any text, not to wait for any ym mssgs to send me off through the day, no more signs that I might be atleast worth something valuable to you.. and I wish that I will have the better understanding to let the red tape in my work pass by, maybe have the reasoning that they might need it better than I do..but would that make me an employee that just turns on a blind eye and a deaf ear to all of those crap?

I hope that I would be back to my normal self, only better since I know I have survived yet another struggle in my life. But for now, all I could do is to get on with my life for now, try my best to just keep personal and professional into 2 different areas of my life, and hopefully time will just heal everything, like it always does.

Backtracking

Im writing this around 4am on Saturday early morning. My ears kinda hurt and my head is feeling woozy since I might be coming down with a slight fever or something. The past few days have been a major adjustment for me since I am now leading the life of a semi normal person in terms of schedule. Ever since I started to work for this industry, I was working the gy shift. Right now, I have the 4am-1pm sched.. Fri Sat off. Sure, it's a bit weird because I have to get up at 2am, which means that I have to be asleep around 8pm. The first few days were all hustle and bustle since I have to take a cab everyday just to get there on time.. (I have to login before 4am to get the night shift allowance) and when I get there, after a few minutes of reading my emails, I have to go ahead and barge my agents since I have some who will be logging out at 6am.. then I do the rounds of checking up on everyone (how they're doing and everything) and not to mention, the meetings that I have in between.. Yup, I lead a busy life in this shift, but once it's 1pm, it's usually a breeze to work on the deliverables since I'm not that too tired, although, I fell asleep one time while doing QA. But what I love most about this shift is that when I go home (which is around 4pm), I see people going home with me.. (re: RushHour!) I love it as I walk the streets of Ayala and see the hundreds of working people like me, hurrying to their appointments or wherever and it just feels more alive.
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We actually got together last week to celebrate my friend Techy's birthday. We watched Harry Potter (which again, did not live to its book counterpart!) and just hanged out until Thursday early morning at Starbucks. We also learned that Keith has retracted his resignation (yipee! double yipee for astorbabe!) since he was offered a position as part of the TAG team for Earthlink.. (Thanks to Chino!)
I get to see him around now,walking with his clipboard at hand, looking like a surveyor.. hehe!





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From the prose collection of Stella Deranged..


I made the resolution to finally call it quits.
I give up.
Maybe I just deluded myself in believing in those times where you were so nice, where in fact, that was just some innate trait since you treated everyone who's close to you that way.

No tears.
I may have used up all my tears reserved for this event. The difference is that today, I really meant it.

No sad goodbyes.
You won't see any farewell letters, confession letters, what might have been letters.. I'm just going to forget you cold turkey.
You will never know, or atleast you won't hear from me that I have felt this way towards you,though, if you say you didn't at least felt it, I might really start to wonder what planet you came from..